When you walked down the aisle, you were probably full of optimism for your marriage. Unfortunately, not every marriage ends in happiness. Because you have worked hard to get where you are in life, you may not want to give your spouse more than she or he deserves.
If you are heading toward divorce, your spouse may want you to dissolve your marriage through mediation. While mediation can be an effective way to reach an agreement, it is not right for everyone. Here are five signs you should skip mediation and head straight to Illinois divorce court.
1. You do not care about your spouse’s wellbeing
While it is somewhat adversarial, mediation is also collaborative. That is, when you decide to pursue mediation, you agree to consider your spouse’s point of view. You also work toward a solution that allows you and your spouse to keep something meaningful. If you are angry and want to ruin your spouse financially, mediation is probably not a good option.
2. You were the victim of spousal abuse
To mediate effectively, both spouses must have equal bargaining power. If you were the victim of spousal abuse, your partner has already shown an unwillingness to consider your point of view. Even worse, you may not be able to safely discuss your separation with an abusive spouse.
3. Your spouse has a distorted view of reality
Some individuals are incapable of viewing facts as they are. If your spouse commits to a certain narrative and refuses to budge, you may not make much headway through mediation.
4. You would rather not make sacrifices
You may believe you should receive most of your marital assets. When you engage in mediation, you agree to sacrifice certain items in exchange for others. If you are not willing to bargain in good faith, mediation probably is not a good fit for you.
5. You do not have time to waste
Finally, mediation often requires a significant amount of back and forth communication. As you may suspect, mediation can drag on for months or longer. If you are in a hurry to finalize your divorce, you may want to skip mediation altogether.
Divorcing your spouse can be overwhelming and heartbreaking. While mediation may help you reach a commonsense conclusion, it is not right for everyone. If you face a formidable barrier to mediation, you may be better off skipping the process and hiring a divorce attorney immediately.